Last week proved to be one of enlightenment. This is what I discovered:
1: Miley Cyrus prefers to go bare back.
(Photo: Daily Mail)
When you've exhausted the shock factor of the high-rise leotard and lycra just isn't doing it for you anymore, what's a girl to do but remove all clothing except for two tiny and shall we say, well placed, ice-cream nipple patches. However, Miley - as acute as ever - is quick to reassure the world, that what is smothered across her chest is in fact glitter and not a rash, because obviously that is what we were looking at!
2: Fashion-ites can't act…
But Anna Wintour is fabulous. Watch WhoWhatWear's interview 'Anna Wintour Reveals 73 Things You Didn't Know About Her'. The silver tray of shades is utter brilliance. And if you need further proof of my former statement, watch Rachel Zoe's cameo on Gossip Girl to get my drift.
3: The uncanny similarities between Tim Burton and my subconscious.
(Photo: Deviant Art)
At least in my dreams anyway… Recently as soon as my head hits the pillow the crazy is unleashed, so I did some research into dreams, why we dream, blah, blah, blah and basically learnt diddley squat. However, what I did discover was how fun it is when you *try* to interpret dreams. Whether it's latent desire, frustration or just your brain going into overdrive, trying to find meaning in the chaos that is your brain is strangely addictive!
4: A 'good girl' has gone real bad.
(Photo:WhoWhatWear)
Rihanna, Rihanna. I'm shaking my head at you. Alexander Wang is the Prince of fashion, as I'm sure you'll all agree (in succession to King Karl FYI) but just because it's got his name on it, that doesn't automatically make it a good idea. You already know my thoughts on leggings so I won't go on, but these are a pair I could potentially see myself investing in. However, the two pieces together are a shave too close to camel toe territory, it's almost too much for me to bear (I've actually had to scroll down to get the picture off the screen and save myself the fuss of a potential stroke). Worn with a thick jumper and this look could be stellar… See it doesn't always pay to lift looks straight off the runway. We'll give RiRi the benefit of the doubt, I mean kudos for actually having clothes on. Wang's collaboration with H&M hits stores November 6th and yes I am delirious with excitement.
5: I need a cricket jumper ASAP.
(Preen Thornton Bregazzi. Photo: ManRepeller)
Thanks to those creative people over at Preen, I now have my autumnal obsession sorted for this year. The sports-luxe thing has been kicking about ever since Sporty Spice first came cartwheeling on to the scene and various takes on the look have since ensued, but Preen's recent show has rejuvenated this borderline tired look, adding new gumption. Jet black and stark white offset flashes of rainbow with space-age structuring and strong silhouettes, all with a smattering of beaded fringing. Love it!
6: My shoe obsession is pretty much out of control.
And it's all thanks to La Moda. I don't know how I managed to feed my addiction before I discovered this little beaut. Cool, on-trend and devastatingly affordable. Plus right now they have £5 off on selected autumn styles.
7: Bridget Jones is my type of girl.
(Photo: Pheonix Mag)
After recently purchasing 'Bridget Jones' Diary' I feel a strong affinity with our leading lady. I've seen the films and they were pretty good but nothing beats actually reading the book. Maybe it's the literature nerd in me but you get so much more out of the story when looking at it in it's native form. Helen Fielding's writing is quintessentially British with her dry wit and cutting sarcasm and I love her and the book for it. Also her ability to use 'fuckwittage' whilst making a feminist stand against misogynist men and their rampant sex-drive is very commendable. (Also if 'selfie' is in the dictionary then why 'fuckwittage' isn't is utterly beyond me).
8: Something worthwhile to distract yourself with.
I have only recently discovered this young British chap abroad in Japan and I am honestly addicted. His trials in this foreign land are hilarious. Watch 'KFC Christmas Japan: A delicious alternate reality' for a culture shock and also 'LOVE Hotels in Japan' because, well, just WOW!
9: Miracles do come true.
(Photo: Amazon)
I'd heard of this ointment beforehand but actually possessing it had always alluded me. However, on my recent trip to Australia, (in a supermarket no less!) the little red tube caught my attention. Without a second thought it was in my basket, beeping through the checkout and I was skipping out of the automatic doors. What am I talking about I hear you scream in annoyance? Lucas Pawpaw Ointment. Any sores, spots, scrapes, dry skin or any other ailments that might befall you will disappear. Honestly I don't leave the house without it. Number one travel companion for life.
10: The joys of spooning.
(Photo: Cardboard Love)
Life is hard enough without your bread going to bits mid buttering. Ditch the knife in favour of a spoon to avoid the pit-falls of broken bread.
I hope you feel as enriched as I do now that I have shared with you my knowledge. Go forth and live out my wisdom.
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